Saturday, July 18, 2009

You Will NOT Believe What She Did Now!

What did I do to deserve this?

GUESS WHAT SHE DID.

YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE IT.

SHE GOT CORN COB LITTER.

Yes, you heard me. Corn cob litter, only it doesn't actually look like the stuff that appears after all the yellow stuff is eaten off the ears of corn. It looks like a pile of wood shavings, only when you get close it smells really funny.

The food and water girl... well, she... she... SHE FEELS SHE HAS TO MONITOR ME WHEN I NEED TO USE THE LITTER BOX. This, of course, is ridiculous and certainly a behavior that will end when I start my world domination. She says I get in and I dig to China and then I get out without actually doing anything. And to make matters worse, she hears me and she yells, "Bus is in the litter! Someone go check on her!" if she's not there and can't do it. Really? MUST I put up with this embarrassment?

So she got this corn cob litter and it's worse than when they mix a box of Arm & Hammer into the regular litter. But the food and water girl's mom read this thing online where you shouldn't inhale cat litter and that it's bad for you. I inhale it all the time and look at me! I'm perfectly fine!

And so she dumps the old litter out, which is perfectly fine, and puts the new litter in, which is bad. And I was waiting to go, so I was dancing around her feet crying, until I saw the box.

And then I started screaming.

Really? How does she think she can do this to me? I am a cat; the only way I should have to go is on bentonite clay, but apparently beans shouldn't inhale bentonite clay so I'm left going on corn cobs.

The food and water girl picked me up and set me in the box.

I SANK IN UP TO MY ARMPITS.

I was so startled I couldn't move. The food and water girl took my paw and scratched in the litter - if you can call it that - like she humiliatingly did when I was being litter trained. And so I yanked my paw free and bit her.

"Buster Theodora! That is very bad!"

I don't care.

Corn cob litter?

It doesn't even effectively clump!
-Buster Theodora

P.S. Is your cat plotting to kill you?
Yeah, for failing to provide adequately clumping litter, I am!
Thanks, Derby! Saw the link in one of your older posts!

Tough Ass Tortie Association Member!

Tough Ass Tortie Association Member!
I have Tortie-Tude!

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